I wish I had an IT nerd. (AKA: How to defeat "Acquiring Network Address")

I’d like to share with you the great frustration that comes with a new wireless router and a new internet connection, and the solution to a particular problem I encountered with it.

This is probably rather boring, but I insist on presenting it nevertheless in the hopes that someone else googling along with the same problem will find this post useful.

An exciting new box arrives home with dad one day with an e-mail accompanying it, proclaiming the log-in password and how to communicate with the box. It does not say anything else, such as why a new router is even required or if any IP numbers (weird numbers that make stuff work) have to be changed..

So I happily plug this bugger in, establish a wireless connection with it from the laptop that already had all the settings and wonder why it isn’t connecting. After two days of communication with the ISP (internet service provider) via dad’s IT support, we find out that it won’t work because we still have the old connection. Fair enough.

Then the fateful day comes, and of course, the internet doesn’t work. I didn’t expect it would. I phone the ISP and ask what’s up. After a few refrains of Simply Red, a friendly fellow finally replies. Apparently the geezer who was meant to plug in the internet somewhere in the magical land of phoneline connections gave our internet to some other phone number, presumably the neighbours or perhaps granny.

It takes this bloke 1 day to return to the scene and this time plug it into the right number.

Success. I can surf. On one laptop. However, my own pc refuses to establish connection. It is stuck in an eternal loop, exclaiming “Acquiring Network Address.” Shit. I discover that if I uninstall my wireless card and then reinstall it, it will sometimes let me connect. “Repair connection” does nothing, and “Set up a home or small office network” enjoys limited success. However, the connection is very cranky and disconnects me every 2½ minutes - far too fast for me to be able to do anything sensible online.

Also, I happily discover that it goes back to “Acquiring Network Address” after rebooting. This meant that every time I started up the pc, I had to spend anywhere between 1 to 2 hours randomly repeating the mantra of “Uninstall, install, setup network” before I got my comme-ci-comme-ca connection back.

Growing angry, I surfed online. I came to the conclusion that:
1) My network card didn’t support WPA encryption OR
2) It was damaged
The solution in either case was buying a new card.

After surfing online for an hour, I grew rather annoyed at the limited amount of wireless cards available in my area, and at the pricetag for decent ones varying from between 50€ to 500€. I decided to fuck around with the wireless router.

SO! After this long blabbering litany of explaining the problem, I present to you the solutions I found offered on the web and my success with them.

1) Change the SSID.

No effect. But at least I was able to change it to something more befitting a network than the default crud.

2) Change from WPA encryption to WEP.

PARTIAL SUCCESS! At least I’m no longer “Acquiring network address” nonstop! Unfortunately, I continue to lose connection every 2½ minutes.

3) Repair connection

No effect. But it did make me think of sacrificing small children.

4) Disable the program that came with the wireless card and set Windows to manage your wireless internet connection.

No effect. Now I just get to watch the error message in a different font instead.

5) Change the properties of my wireless card in Network Connections - disable Microsoft TCP/IP version 6.
(Rightclick on wireless connection => Properties. Scroll down in “This connection uses the following items. Uncheck the box for evil Microsoft Madness.)

COMPLETE SUCCESS! WOOT!
Unfortunately, at this point of the night I was supposed to go to sleep, but I didn’t spend hours mucking about searching for a solution just to go to sleep upon success! I spent a few hours doing nothing useful but enjoying the speed, which seems to be 2.2 times faster than my former connection. Ah well.

BONUS ROUND! Also, I would like to add a possible solution to the problem: “I just installed a new processor/fan/heatsink/whatever and now my pc won’t start!”

Did you check the little cables inside that go from the power switch to the power switch spot on the motherboard are plugged into the right jumpers?

I’m so ashamed. I didn’t even noticed I’d plugged stuff in upside down until I looked at the manual and saw that the diagram there was a complete mirror image to what it says on the actual motherboard. Sigh. At least it was cheap to repair. Shame it took me 2 bloody days to figure out.